One of my favorite parts of teaching is getting students into dyads for in-depth interaction. Who doesn’t love a good pair share? That said, moving that classroom element into Zoom rooms—or any other online setting—puts a wrench in the works. This post will offer a few tips for how to deal with such wrench-tossing. It’ll also give you some tools so you can keep your classes, meetings and other gatherings nicely fresh.
In regular classroom settings—ah, the days of meeting in person!—I like Pair Shares for two reasons in particular. First, they create greater investment and connection for the students. Each gets to reflect on the current subject without interruption. And each gets to practice the kindness of attentive listening–both receiving and giving. Typically, after each partner in the pair has shared, I also give them the chance to converse more naturally for another snippet of time: what did your partner say that you want to appreciate, connect with, or ask more about? Participants almost always appreciate those extra few moments of bonding.
Second, using Pair Shares keeps my teaching fresh by giving me the chance to play when directing which of the pair will speak first. Sure, I could just say “Choose an A and a B. A speaks first, B listens first.” But, bleh. And if you think I’d choose “bleh,” you don’t know me.
I’d much rather something more whimsical. Like “Choose one of you to be ‘alternator,’ one to be ‘carburetor.’” Or “One of you is ‘jellybean,’ one of you is ‘junior mint.’” Once they’ve made their choices over a few chuckle-filled moments, I let them know who will go first. I usually don’t plan what the options ahead of time because I like surprising myself. That said, I do try to follow a few guidelines.
- Make both options neutral or equally defensible or desirable. “Spider-Man and Wonder Woman” works well. “Winner and loser” not so much.
- Use choices that everyone will know. “Barry Manilow or Marie Osmond” might not fly with a younger set. “Lizzo or Pink” might not work with an older or international group.
- Make it clear that the choices are ONLY for determining who goes first and not that they have to role play from that perspective. I once gave the prompt “One is peanut butter; one is jelly” and then heard one of the students speaking slowly and awkwardly as if he had a mouth full of peanut butter! No, no. It’s just to get you started!
Again, it’s quick. It’s easy. It’s connective. And it delivers a little boost of self-inflicted delight.
And then there’s Zoom. These days, my improv make-it-up-in-the-moment method suffers. Pair shares still work fine in breakout rooms, sure. They bring needed energy to a group of students. Folks head out, connect with each other, and come back with greater vitality and focus (though I miss the buzz and read-the-crowd assessment I’d usually pick up on). What doesn’t work now is my “come up with it on the spot” methodology for deciding who goes first. Because they head to the breakout room before knowing who their partner will be, they can’t negotiate who will take on which role. Even if I delivered the “who goes first?” news via message to the Breakout Rooms, I have no easy way to confirm who’s ready to find out.
To make the transition smoother, I’ve started brainstorming playful ways to tell students before they go to breakout rooms, who will go first once they get there. These directions give folks a chance to connect briefly with a likely smile—and they don’t generate conversation or chit-chat that takes time away from the task at hand. Students learn a tiny bit about each other—connection—but still get right to it.
Without farther ado, then, here are some possibilities you can use for figuring out who in a breakout room pair speaks first, along with some “templates” you can use for creating more of your own. If you come up with some good suggestions, please let me know here or through a direct message. I’d love to build up my stockpile!
POSSIBLE PROMPTS TO DETERMINE WHO GOES FIRST
- Whoever has the longer hair.
- Whose birthday is closest to the beginning of the calendar year
- Whoever is tallest/shortest.
- Whose last name starts with the letter of the alphabet closest to Z.
- Whoever has more/fewer siblings.
- Who’s youngest/oldest.
- Who talked to a family member most recently.
- Who got the most sleep last night.
- Who got laid most recently. (hahaha—probably not, but maybe with the right adult group?).
- Who’s hotter. (hahaha—again, with a self-confident and/or generous group?).
- Whose chair is likely older.
- Who went to the dentist most recently.
- Who has the least healthy coping mechanism for sheltering-in-place.
- Whoever has the most/least number of windows in their room.
- Who has more syllables in their middle name.
- Who speaks more languages.
- Who has more belt loops/pockets on their clothes right now.
- Whose shirt is a color closest to red.
- Who was born farthest away.
- Who got a haircut most recently.
Tips
- Rely on a “template.”
If you want to ramp up your own creativity in the moment, you can lean on the structure of a few “templates” to help get you there.- Farthest to/closest to…
- Most recent…
- Alphabetical order…
- Lowest/Highest number of…
- Size of…
- Year you first…
- Get creative.
Once your students have the hang of the process, you can introduce more “challenging” more playful options. You don’t have to share what makes you come up with your choice; you just need to make a choice (and hopefully laugh about it).- Who’s most likely to have actual witches in their ancestry?
- Who has the weirdest dreams?
- Who would make the better rodeo clown?
- Coach disagreement or uncertainty.
Especially if you use more creative, unspecific comparisons, make sure students remember that ultimately, the point is just to decide who goes first. If the options are unclear or they can’t figure out who qualifies more, they can just choose one of the two to go first.
Here’s hoping these tips help you have more fun and flexibility with your groups on Zoom and any other group meeting software you start using. If you’d like more tips for creating energetic and engaging in-person events, check out this earlier blog post: Facilitating Like a Boss.
Thank you to Monster Baby Podcast co-host Lisa Rowland for help brainstorming these suggestions!
Ted DesMaisons is the founder and principal of Anima Learning, a collaborative consultancy that develops playful mindfulness in conscious leaders, learners and presenters. He co-hosts the Monster Baby Podcast(“A curious romp through the worlds of mindfulness and improvisation”) and his first book, Playful Mindfulness: a joyful journey to everyday confidence calm and connection, has received wide acclaim for its clarity, practical insight, and sense of humor.
